Survey From My Cousin

1. What is your occupation? Web design instructor, waitress/manager, freelance designer, crazy bitch. Oh wait, that last one isn't so much an occupation as a state of being.

2. What color is your swimming suit? My fat ass hasn't seen the inside of a swimming suit for a good many years. I'm thinking of getting one though. Maybe blue. Maybe black. Sky's the limit I guess.

3. What are you listening to right now? The news. Lilo making sleep attack noises. She's so damn cute.

4. What was the last thing you ate? McDonalds. It's been a really, really bad week.

5. Do you wish on stars? Always.

6. If you were a crayon, what color would you be? Ordinarily I stick with the black with silver sparkles but this week I'm alternating between blood red and cold gray. It's a mood thing.

7. How is the weather right now? Fucking cold.

8. Last person you spoke to on the phone? I think that would be the momma.

9. Do you like the person who sent this to you? Yes, she's a good cousin. Very sarcastic. I like that about her.

10. How old are you today? 31. But 30 is the new 20. Or so I hear.

11. Favourite drink? Water, diet coke. Long Island Iced Tea. Mmm...

12. Favourite sport to watch? Dwarf tossing. Followed closely by gator wrasslin' and if that's not really a sport let me tell you my friend, it should be.

13. Have you ever dyed your hair? Nope. No way. I'm a natural beauty. What? You got something to say about it?! It's been a really bad week!

14. Do you wear contacts or glasses? I have glasses for the computer but the dog munched on them (just a little) and now they don't fit so well...

15. Pets? My crazy little crocodile baby, Lilo. She has wookie feet.

16. Favourite month? At this point I'll take any month but this one. Usually I'm pretty fond of October but I'm also partial to July.

17. Favourite food? Sushi. I love it.

18. What was the last movie you watched? The Weatherman. Sucked ass. Not in a good way. But I watched Waiting earlier and it was fantastic.

19. Favourite day of the year? Meh. They're all the pretty much the same aren't they?

20. What do you do to vent anger? Run. That's it. It's the only thing that works. I'm too demure to scream and throw stuff otherwise I'd do that. It sounds fun.

21. Fall or Spring? Fall. No, spring. No, fall. Crap. I can't choose. They're the best of the seasons. I also like summer.

22. Hugs or kisses? Both!

23. Cherry or Blueberry? I'm afraid you're going to have to be more specific. Fresh? Then blueberry. With yogurt. Yum! Pie filling? Cherry. Eaten straight from the can. Gee, why am I fat again? :-)

24. Do you want your friends to email you back? Always. But not this time because I'm just posting, not emailing.

25. Who is most likely to respond? Elvis. He's my bitch.

26. Who is least likely to respond? Um, that's a good question. I'll let you know.

27. Who do you live with? My super cute and chewy baby Lilo. Not that I chew on her. Because I don't. Who've you been talking to!?

28. When was the last time you cried? Couple of minutes ago...like I said, really bad week. Worst week ever maybe. No, not ever. But worst week for this decade for sure.

29. What is on the floor of your closet? Oh god. You so don't want to know. Pretty much every article of clothing I own. And a zillion bags. And maybe a shoe. It's been a rough couple of weeks as far as clothing selection goes.

30. Who is the friend you have had the longest? Oh, this is a bad question. I'm going to pass on this question on the grounds that it's making me cry again. No wait, I'm going to suck it up and answer. Tom. After that, Marla or Marya. I met them both the same year. They rock.

31. What did you do last night? Watched movies, ate ice cream, cried like the sissy that I am. I'm in a wallowing stage right now.

32. Favourite smell? I hate everything right now. But rain in the summer is nice. The air in October (I'm with you cousin!), indian cotton that's warm from the sun.

33. What inspires you most? People who love life and live it to the fullest.

34. What are you afraid of? Spiders. Losing the people I love. Being lied to by people I trust.

35. Plain, cheese or spicy hamburgers? Cheese! Ooo...and that 5 alarm something or other burger at Red Robin. So yummy!

36. Favourite car? Mine! Okay, still the VW Karmenghia.

37. Favourite dog breed? Lilo! She's of the stretchy wookie feet breed. I also love her fluffy puppy ears. She's the best. Bad breath though. Bordering on terrifying really.

38. Number of keys on your key ring? Um, should I know this? I'm going to say 6. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

39. How many years at your current job? Which one? About 1 year for the restaurant, 6 months at the college, and a long time for the freelancing.

40. Favourite day of the week? I'm with the cousin again on the Saturday thing. But not this week because this week I'm working for Saucy who's going to California. Bastard.

41. How many states have you lived in? I'm currently in a state of disbelief but I'm thinking of moving back to the state of denial. It's home.

42. How many cities have you lived in/name them? Oh god. Duncan, Campbell River, St.Paul, Lantzville, Nanaimo, Sayward, Quadra Island, Burnaby, Tokyo, and Calgary. Oh and Shin-Kamigawa. I think that's it. 11.

43. Who do you want to spend the rest of your life with? Johnny Depp and the doglet. But in a pinch I'd settle for Bill Murray. He's old but man, he makes me laugh.

44. Favourite alcoholic beverage? I'm into the Long Island Iced Teas at the moment thanks to the other cousin.

45. Do you exercise? Yep. Giant ass slowly shrinking. But not this week. Bad ice cream!

46. How many kids do you have? Kids?! Um, 4 but don't tell anybody. I've been keeping them in the shed.

47. What celebrity do you want be? That's a good question. I'm going to think about that one. Someone blonde and whorey. They seem to be popular. Kidding. Sort of.

48. If you were that celebrity would you be friends with you? No way. I'd be friends with Paris Hilton and only Paris Hilton. My dog could play with her dog while we shopped. We could train them to crap on demand. It would be great. I'm so kidding.