Now I ask you...do you have any idea how annoying it is to have a cricket trapped behind your fridge?
Because I was sitting in my bathroom listening to the crickets chirping away and I thought to myself "self, how nice it is to be sitting here in the bathroom listening to the lovely little crickets chirping away." They're so much nicer than those cracked out cicadas. Because nobody likes them. And that got me to thinking about summertime because as we all know crickets = summer and then I was starting to feel a little irritation edging in on my warm and fuzzy happy time with the summer reminiscing (that's totally not how you spell that) and I was wondering "hey, what's with the irritation?" and then I remembered!
When I was back in Nanaimo, sharing a house with the 14 year old boy trapped in a big 40 year old pig body that walked around all the time in it's underwear with no regard for my sensitive girly eyes or the sensitive girly eyes of my friends a cricket got trapped behind our fridge and chirped it's little heart out until it died. Which took a surprisingly long time now that I think about it and drove me and my beautiful little kitties completely mental in the meantime.
I have no real point here. I just thought I'd share. Because I'm all about the sharing. I'm just good like that.
Thursday, August 26, 2004
Wednesday, August 25, 2004
Turning Japanese.
Why oh why can I not learn japanese faster? I ask you?! I mean honestly. How difficult can it be? Ha ha. Kidding. But I am feeling the frustration. I came to Japan because I thought it would be great and it is so we've decided to stay here and make Tokyo our base but frickin' hell! The language! I know people who came here and could speak good japanese within a year. I can speak useless japanese. Need to know how to say "He is kicking the ball" in japanese then I'm your girl. But really, who needs to say that?! Gaaah!
So anyway, I've decided to go full time at Nova (provided that all goes well) and save up the money to go to japanese school. Not random conversation lessons but serious japanese school. University prep type school. How will I do that and continue to work you ask? I'll jump off that particular bridge when I come to it thank you very much. In the meantime I'll continue with my sissy lessons. "They are paddling a canoe". I'm there.
Meanwhile, Kohsuke and I are going out with a bunch of people he works with on Friday so I'll be able to astonish them with my swanky japanese skills. Once I've had a beer or two. I'm alittle nervous about speaking the japanese to actual japanese people. Makes me feel all twitchy and not in a good way.
I must go and mope around feeling sorry for myself for awhile and then do some studying before I haul my sorry ass off to work so...bye!
So anyway, I've decided to go full time at Nova (provided that all goes well) and save up the money to go to japanese school. Not random conversation lessons but serious japanese school. University prep type school. How will I do that and continue to work you ask? I'll jump off that particular bridge when I come to it thank you very much. In the meantime I'll continue with my sissy lessons. "They are paddling a canoe". I'm there.
Meanwhile, Kohsuke and I are going out with a bunch of people he works with on Friday so I'll be able to astonish them with my swanky japanese skills. Once I've had a beer or two. I'm alittle nervous about speaking the japanese to actual japanese people. Makes me feel all twitchy and not in a good way.
I must go and mope around feeling sorry for myself for awhile and then do some studying before I haul my sorry ass off to work so...bye!
Tuesday, August 24, 2004
Kick the Puppy.
I've decided to open a new theme restaurant here in sunny Tokyo called Kick the Puppy. Diners will be escorted to their table by no one. They will simply kick their way through a large quantity of annoying puppies with sharp needle like teeth who will run around crazily attacking anything that moves or doesn't move with a special focus on articles that are delicate such as nylon stockings or lacy shirts. Points will be given according to number of puppies kicked and distance said puppies travel.
Anyone feeling the need to practice please feel free to come to my house at any time. Just don't wear anything delicate when you do.
And now I must go as the puppy has apparently decided my time on the internet has been sufficient for today.
Anyone feeling the need to practice please feel free to come to my house at any time. Just don't wear anything delicate when you do.
And now I must go as the puppy has apparently decided my time on the internet has been sufficient for today.
Sunday, August 22, 2004
Ninjaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!
Have I ever mentioned how much I love the theme restaurants in Tokyo? Because I do. Last night we went to a fantastico theme restaurant called Ninja. It was groovy. Groovilicious even. But a tad on the pricey side. It was in one of the swankier areas of Tokyo. I like the swank. ANYWAY...
From the outside it looked like a crazy black box but not reeally box shaped...sort of like a box with too much stuff in it so the sides bulge out. And it was all ridgy. And there was a small sign which was just their logo all backlit and swanky. I dug it. Inside it was...black! And the staff were all dressed up in ninja attire (more black...gee, why did I like it?).
It was quite lovely and mysterious really. To get to our table we had to be led by a ninja (they called it our ninja training) through a series of narrow hallways with hidden doors and boobytraps. One section that made me particularly happy involved what looked like a missing section of the floor with a stony crevasse (I said crevasse! tee hee) with plants growing on the rocks and whatnot. It was all jungly and cool and we thought it was probably covered in glass and we'd have to walk across it but no! Our ninja trainer clapped her hands and summoned a bridge. It was great. There were lots of spots where we had to duck to go through and then finally we got to the seating section of the restaurant and it was still dark but lovely and we had a private room and the walls looked kind of cavey. I didn't know that ninjas lived in caves but hey, why quibble. Our room was called Something Japanese I Can't Remember Semi. A semi is a japanese cicada.
The food was pretty expensive but the presentation was beautiful. It was like in those 80s movies where poor people go out somewhere for dinner and the food comes in tiny portions and it looks more like art than food and then afterwards they go to McDonalds for a cheeseburger. We didn't do that because Kumiko, Kazuki, Kohsuke and I just ordered a lot of small things and shared so we were full. Ish. Comfortably not hungry. It was quite delicious.
Kumiko didn't like it so much because she said our waiter had a bad attitude. I think he didn't really know what to do with a room full of foreigners. Our friend Ben is a tall australian and every time he stood up his head would hit the bamboo light thingys and the waiter would shriek "please be careful!" "please watch out!" It was kind of funny really. And then he got a little bit pissy because we don't really order like japanese people. Usually one person does most of the ordering and then everybody just shares so sometimes waiters find it annoying to go around and take orders from everyone individually. But it all worked out in the end.
And then when we'd finished eating another ninja guy came and did magic tricks for us. It was great. He knew a little english and kept shrieking "I am ninjaaaa!" So fun. He was quite amusing. Happiness is a magic making ninja. Yes indeed.
I almost forgot to tell you about the fun thing! Shae and Moody both ordered this salad (which was supposed to be large portion but it SO wasn't - was it Moody?) but the cool thing is that it came out in this fun glass bowl on a wooden box and inside the box was a red light and some dry ice so it was all glowy and there was smoke billowing out everywhere. I don't think they were too impressed as it really was quite small but hey, it made me happy! Woo hoo! Glowy, smoky dinner! I think they should serve everything that way. EVERYTHING! Okay bye!
Nin! (that's what ninjas say. I don't know why. )
From the outside it looked like a crazy black box but not reeally box shaped...sort of like a box with too much stuff in it so the sides bulge out. And it was all ridgy. And there was a small sign which was just their logo all backlit and swanky. I dug it. Inside it was...black! And the staff were all dressed up in ninja attire (more black...gee, why did I like it?).
It was quite lovely and mysterious really. To get to our table we had to be led by a ninja (they called it our ninja training) through a series of narrow hallways with hidden doors and boobytraps. One section that made me particularly happy involved what looked like a missing section of the floor with a stony crevasse (I said crevasse! tee hee) with plants growing on the rocks and whatnot. It was all jungly and cool and we thought it was probably covered in glass and we'd have to walk across it but no! Our ninja trainer clapped her hands and summoned a bridge. It was great. There were lots of spots where we had to duck to go through and then finally we got to the seating section of the restaurant and it was still dark but lovely and we had a private room and the walls looked kind of cavey. I didn't know that ninjas lived in caves but hey, why quibble. Our room was called Something Japanese I Can't Remember Semi. A semi is a japanese cicada.
The food was pretty expensive but the presentation was beautiful. It was like in those 80s movies where poor people go out somewhere for dinner and the food comes in tiny portions and it looks more like art than food and then afterwards they go to McDonalds for a cheeseburger. We didn't do that because Kumiko, Kazuki, Kohsuke and I just ordered a lot of small things and shared so we were full. Ish. Comfortably not hungry. It was quite delicious.
Kumiko didn't like it so much because she said our waiter had a bad attitude. I think he didn't really know what to do with a room full of foreigners. Our friend Ben is a tall australian and every time he stood up his head would hit the bamboo light thingys and the waiter would shriek "please be careful!" "please watch out!" It was kind of funny really. And then he got a little bit pissy because we don't really order like japanese people. Usually one person does most of the ordering and then everybody just shares so sometimes waiters find it annoying to go around and take orders from everyone individually. But it all worked out in the end.
And then when we'd finished eating another ninja guy came and did magic tricks for us. It was great. He knew a little english and kept shrieking "I am ninjaaaa!" So fun. He was quite amusing. Happiness is a magic making ninja. Yes indeed.
I almost forgot to tell you about the fun thing! Shae and Moody both ordered this salad (which was supposed to be large portion but it SO wasn't - was it Moody?) but the cool thing is that it came out in this fun glass bowl on a wooden box and inside the box was a red light and some dry ice so it was all glowy and there was smoke billowing out everywhere. I don't think they were too impressed as it really was quite small but hey, it made me happy! Woo hoo! Glowy, smoky dinner! I think they should serve everything that way. EVERYTHING! Okay bye!
Nin! (that's what ninjas say. I don't know why. )
Thursday, August 12, 2004
Yeah. Whatever.
As you know, I work in an English puppy mill, I mean conversation school with all the englishy goodness that the name would imply. However, to become a japanese staff member at said school english is not a requirement. Strange you might think but no, we're in Japan and the customers are all japanese (with a sprinkling of chinese and korean to keep things lively) so maybe it's not such a big deal. Perhaps. But the thing is that a big part of the service the staff provides is to give the students counselling on how they are doing and what they could be doing to better improve their english progress. Which of course involves some communication with us, the teachers. You would think.
Picture if you will a cute, little japanese woman in her early 20s. She likes her hair, and her sparkly belt and I think she's quite fond of her shoes. The bulk of her day is spent standing behind the counter with one knee slightly bent, one arm raised slightly with the hand dangling limply while the other hand continuously adjusts and readjusts the same three or four strands of hair artfully left out from her loosly tied side pony tail. Yes, side pony tail. This is a girl who looks startled and then deeply confused when you say to her "hello, how are you?" The same thing you say to her everyday. Now picture trying to explain to her the specific problems and possible solutions for them of your students and imagine her staring back at you with knee slightly bent, hands dangling and a slightly disinterested, slightly bewildered look. I think I'm a reasonably patient person. I like my students, and I like my job and I love Japan. And I usually like the staff. But I think I may have to stab her in the eye with my pen.
Next installment: why I hate the other idiot staff woman with her overly ear piercing enthusiasm, high pitched whine and tiny, tiny brain.
Not that I'm bitter. Oh no.
Picture if you will a cute, little japanese woman in her early 20s. She likes her hair, and her sparkly belt and I think she's quite fond of her shoes. The bulk of her day is spent standing behind the counter with one knee slightly bent, one arm raised slightly with the hand dangling limply while the other hand continuously adjusts and readjusts the same three or four strands of hair artfully left out from her loosly tied side pony tail. Yes, side pony tail. This is a girl who looks startled and then deeply confused when you say to her "hello, how are you?" The same thing you say to her everyday. Now picture trying to explain to her the specific problems and possible solutions for them of your students and imagine her staring back at you with knee slightly bent, hands dangling and a slightly disinterested, slightly bewildered look. I think I'm a reasonably patient person. I like my students, and I like my job and I love Japan. And I usually like the staff. But I think I may have to stab her in the eye with my pen.
Next installment: why I hate the other idiot staff woman with her overly ear piercing enthusiasm, high pitched whine and tiny, tiny brain.
Not that I'm bitter. Oh no.
Tuesday, August 10, 2004
Pretty Boring
I haven't been posting much because I haven't really had much to say recently. It's still hot, I'm still studying japanese and GRE ickiness in the mornings before work and the puppy is still a small, toothy bundle of love. The situation in my school seems to be improving...I don't dread walking in the door as much as I did for awhile there. This is probably due to the new trainer (or assistant trainer of whatever his title is) being actually a normal person (so far). I think that maybe I like him. We've had such dorks in the past though that I'm trying to refrain from deciding this second. I hate to think that I like someone and then find out that they're really a complete ass-monkey.
I'm a little blah these days. I'm wishing I had a friend I could just bum around with without having to actually make plans or worry about whether or not they're enjoying themselves, are they bored, are they tired, do they have to pee (kidding) you know. I think things might improve if my transfer ever comes through. I live too far away from everybody in Nishi-Kasai for the casual hanging out to be feasible. Having to travel an hour each way kind of sucks the fun out of the "hey, let's hang out and watch tv together" kind of plan. Although, now that I think about it I don't know that I've ever had a friend like that. I have a lot of good friends but not the kind that just drop by out of the blue on a regular basis. It's just never been really feasible. Oh wait, Kohsuke used to drop by all the time when Jon and I were together. But I married him so he doesn't count anymore. Damn. I'm babbling now so I'm going to just go watch some bad english tv. It's cheesy horror movie week. Monday was the Fog, Tuesday was Fright Night so today must be something really awful. I'm excited. I love the cheese.
Okay bye!
I'm a little blah these days. I'm wishing I had a friend I could just bum around with without having to actually make plans or worry about whether or not they're enjoying themselves, are they bored, are they tired, do they have to pee (kidding) you know. I think things might improve if my transfer ever comes through. I live too far away from everybody in Nishi-Kasai for the casual hanging out to be feasible. Having to travel an hour each way kind of sucks the fun out of the "hey, let's hang out and watch tv together" kind of plan. Although, now that I think about it I don't know that I've ever had a friend like that. I have a lot of good friends but not the kind that just drop by out of the blue on a regular basis. It's just never been really feasible. Oh wait, Kohsuke used to drop by all the time when Jon and I were together. But I married him so he doesn't count anymore. Damn. I'm babbling now so I'm going to just go watch some bad english tv. It's cheesy horror movie week. Monday was the Fog, Tuesday was Fright Night so today must be something really awful. I'm excited. I love the cheese.
Okay bye!
Thursday, August 05, 2004
Creepy Nightmares
Okay, so ever since I was a little kid I've had these bouts of reoccurring nightmares. Ever couple of years for about a week or so I have really creepy nightmares about my teeth. It's the weirdest thing. So, this past week I've been treated to another round. The places and situations change but the theme is the bit that's always the same. When I was little they would take place in an elementary school (not any elementray school but a sort of composite of all of the elementary schools I had ever been to) and would sometimes involve other people. The most notable one of these featured my Uncle Barry who was for some reason visiting me at school (at night because it's a freaky ass dream so of course the circumstances are often freaky as well) and we stop for a drink at a water fountain and suddenly his teeth crumbled and fell out into the water and then so did mine. And it's strange because as with the best nightmares I could've sworn that I felt it happening. A few years ago I had another bout while in university in Nanaimo where I would be doing ordinary things (going to school or just hanging out) and suddenly my teeth would begin to crumble or just fall out whole. After one particularly vivid dream I actually woke up with 2 chipped teeth. Needless to say it was quite disturbing. So this past week I've been having yet another variation on the dream. I'm at my current age and here in Japan but of course so is everybody else I've ever known and I'm at my apartment (which of course isn't my actual apartment but a creepy, bizarro nightmare apartment - which actual sounds like some of the real apartments I've lived in now that I think about it...) and we're having some kind of dinner party with people I haven't seen for ages (and never really liked for that matter) when suddenly I feel something strange going on with my back teeth. So I discreetly sit on the floor wedged between a giant piece of furniture which suddenly appears beside the table and a sliding door which also makes a rather sudden appearance and reach into my mouth to check out what's going on in there. And to my horror (oh yes my friends, horror with a capital ROR as in hor-ROR) some of my teeth are loose. Not just a little loose but loose like when you're a kid and you're losing your baby teeth and you can wiggle them around with your tongue until that last little stringy thing connecting the tooth to the gum finally snaps and you can pluck that sucker out of there. A couple of nights ago it was some of my front teeth which was unsettling (as I'm sure you can imagine). I mean what little girl doesn't hope and dream about becoming a toothless hag at 30? Did I mention that I also have very bad hair in these dreams? Gah! Anyway, last night it was the back teeth. So there I was, wedged against my sliding door, wiggling my teeth (some of which were kind of hollow...weird) until they were hanging by one little thread. There were about 4 of them on the go. And I was thinking "okay, if you hurry you can pullthem out before anyone notices and go back to the party and no one will know that you're a total freak." Which sounds like a plan to me. But the last strings holding the teeth are really really strong, and stretchy. And suddenly they hurt. And I can't pull them out but now I've got 4 teeth attached to the gums by stringy bits that are about an inch long so I obviously can't pretend that nothing's happening and then I wake up and I'm so relieved but I have to check to make sure it was just a dream (because that's what you do isn't it?) and oh shit. The same teeth that were loose in my dream are actually loose. Not as loose of course but quite loose nonetheless. This is not a good thing. And then suddenly I'm back in the creepy apartment with my annoying guests, one of whom is trying to take over my party with some nasty buns that she bought because I'm still wedged up against the sliding door trying to secretly remove my freaky teeth before anyone (especially the party highjacker) notices. And then I really woke up. And my teeth aren't loose although I've got to admit, I couldn't bring myself to actually check them for quite awhile. So frickin' creepy.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
