Lalalalalalala. La!

Last night I watched the Wedding Crashers. It was funny. I dug it. But for some reason it left me feeling a bit...not sad and not wiggy but not far from it. Wig-esque maybe. It was really funny and I laughed pretty much the whole way through in my louder than really appropriate for the theatre laugh which was good but it was a romantic comedy about weddings and when viewed from the perspective of a woman on the verge of divorce, living in Duncan with not much in the way of romance on the horizon it was just a little depressing. But not really depressing. You know I think I used to be better at describing things. I guess it just made me think a bit too much about my life and what I want it to be and what it actually is and...yep. So it put me in an odd mood. Not sad, not wiggy, not depressed but a little too introspective to be fun. Bah! No more romantic comedies for me! All action all the time. That's my new motto. Which sounds kind of dirty now that I think about it. Sweet. And now I have to say just how much I love Vince Vaughn and Luke Wilson (shut up senor!)together with the banter and the whatnot. There's sort of an easy chemistry to them that makes it seem as though they really are friends. I like that kind of mellow familiarity. Luke Wilson seems to have that in most of his movies now that I think about it. I may have to go home and watch the Royal Tenenbaums and Zoolander again.

What else is new? Nothing much really. I'm feeling a bit like I'm in some sort of suspended animation or limbo or something. Waiting for something to happen. Waiting to find out if I have a class to teach in the fall, waiting to find a grad school (okay, I'm actually actively looking for a grad school but it still feels like waiting somehow), waiting to find the meaning of life (whatever, I already know the meaning of life but I'm so not telling!) waiting to lose the last of my ass (shut up! 35lbs down and only about 100 left to go - okay, more like 50 or 60 but it's my blog and I can exaggerate if I want to! :-)). I'm feeling as though I live such a passive life all of the sudden. Like I want all these different things but I lack the drive or the balls (both figuratively and literally) to go out and get them. Like I'm waiting for the stars to align and the zodiac to be working in my favour and my magic eight ball to tell me all signs point to yes before I can actually do anything. But what exactly is it that I want to do you might ask? I'm not sure. I'm still waiting to find out.

But at least I have a plan for today. Wash my hair (there's a spider on the shower curtain that I'm sure wants revenge for the death of it's ridiculously over sized friend last night so washing my hair in the sink it is!), finish the glass trim in my friend's bathroom, thai food for lunch (is there any better food? God I miss Tokyo and the Mango Tree thai buffet in the Marunouchi Building - Moody, you need to go there and take pictures of everything for me! Including the designer housewives lunching on their husband's credit cards with their piles of shopping bags around them - I so miss the ostentatiousness of it all) and then back to lovely Duncan with the doglet for an evening of movies on my tiny, tiny dvd player and letting the landlord in to fix the leak in my bathroom that I didn't even know was there. And maybe a quick run now that my gimpy leg is completely normal again. It's all glamour all the time for this girl! And then sleep. Sleep is good.

Reading over this post I realise that I'm giving the impression that I'm not very happy right now and that's a little misleading. I'm not unhappy. I think that maybe I'm just a little bored. I need some excitement. I need to feel that I'm moving forward and not just loitering around my life waiting to be told to move on by some metaphorical security guard. I need my life to be a bit less like Bridget Jones Diary and more like one of those bodice ripping romance novels set on the high seas. Arrrrgh! Shiver me timbers and whatnot. At least for a little while anyway. I really have no idea what I'm talking about. Could you tell? My feet are getting itchy and I'm having the urge to wander. I just don't have enough to keep me happily anchored here but I have too much to be completely weightless. And so I float. Tethered to my little life like a balloon on a string. I'm mixing my metaphors here but I couldn't think of anything more water based without using the word buoy which I just don't like. Anyway, I'm off to battle the shower curtain lurking spider for possession of the shampoo (I'm pretty sure if I looked close enough there'd be a tiny spider dagger clenched in it's tiny spider grin and it'd be muttering away in it's tiny spider voice "my name is...you killed my father, now you must prepare to die") so I can get on with my day. Damn that spider! I shall overcome! Victory will be mine!

Yes. I am aware that I am a total dork. And I'm comfortable with that.